I Thought You Loved Me…
As I sat outside my local YMCA gym about to go to yet another yoga class, I excitedly grabbed my yoga bag which contained my essentials for class- a mat, a towel, and a bottle of water. I was so happy to have finally started my fitness routine again. While gathering my things I clearly heard a voice say, “I thought you loved me”. Without hesitation I said audibly, “Lord you know I love you”. Anyone watching me probably would have thought I was on the phone with someone.
I felt shocked, hurt, and a little convicted. My thoughts begin to drift towards Jesus' disciple Peter and the conversation Jesus had with him. In John 21 verses 15-17 Jesus asks Peter do you love me three separate times and each time Peter says Yes Lord You know that I love you. Each time Peter answered, Jesus said feed my sheep. For a long moment I was lost in thought, meditating on their conversation like a friend had just confronted me with feelings of being left out of the group.
Two women walked by laughing and it brought me back to awareness that class was starting soon. I dismissed my thoughts as overthinking and shrugged it off. I didn't want to be late, so I grabbed my yoga bag and walked into the studio. When I entered the room the teacher and the other students looked at me so strangely.
I flashed a quick smile, found a place for my mat and sat down. I noticed the question marks on their faces. It was as if they were secretly asking if I was lost? I dismissed that too because as a woman of color I am accustomed to getting those looks in certain places and spaces even though this didn’t appear to be one of those places. I was at the YMCA. Normally friendly and welcoming, today things seemed to be a little off.
Discernment was speaking but I ignored her warning and explained away my feelings as normal human behavior. All throughout the class the teacher was smiling strangely at me. It reminded me of the way Cruella de Vil looked at those dalmatians in One Hundred and One Dalmatians. It made me uncomfortable.
I felt like I was doing something I shouldn't be. Were my poses wrong? Why didn’t she tell me what I was doing wrong? Then I began to question God in my mind. Was it wrong to be exercising? God commanded us to take care of our bodies because they are a temple of the Holy Spirit. Were my yoga tank top and pants too revealing? Something was wrong but I wasn’t sure what. In previous workouts I felt a euphoric energy after it was over.
After this workout I did not feel energized or relaxed at all. I actually felt a little more stressed. I walked back to the car, threw my bag in the backseat and as soon as I started the engine a radio program about Christians and yoga was playing. Coincidence? No, I don't believe in coincidences. God had my full attention now. The hosts were discussing the origins of yoga and how each move, each pose is a form of worship to Krishna.
As I listened, I felt physically sick. I repented and asked God to forgive my ignorance. I thanked Him for loving me enough to let me know how ignorant I had been. Then I drove home, washed the clothes I was wearing and gathered all of my yoga gear in a pile on the floor. It was a sack full of pants, tanks, mats, bags, DVD’s, books, and water bottles.
Any and everything yoga related was packed up and taken to Goodwill. I donated all of my yoga stuff that day because I wanted God to know I heard Him. He took the time to speak to me audibly, then again by how the people in the class treated me, and yet again through the radio program.
I share my experience with you because God is a jealous God. He wants all of us. When we are convicted of something it's God's loving nature. The Holy Spirit is trying to help us turn from wrongdoing and return to Him. I had no understanding that what I had been doing off and on for years was anything more than stretching but after listening to the radio program and reading for myself about how the practice of yoga came to be, I now understood. God had opened my eyes of understanding.
Yoga Practice
“Listen to the words used to describe a thing and you will understand its purpose.”
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Yoga Origins
Listen to the words used to describe a thing and you will understand its purpose. The roots of yoga can be traced back thousands of years to 800 BC. It is not a simple exercise but a disciplined practice of striving to become one with the universe. A common phrase used in yoga is namaste. They say it at the end of every practice. The literal translation is “I bow to you”.
As believers and followers of Jesus Christ we bow to our God, the Almighty, the Great I Am. The Lord is our King of kings. In Matthew 22:37 when asked what the greatest commandment was Jesus replied: “‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.” You may feel like I did that it’s only stretching but it’s so much more. Practicing yoga is opening a door to another deity.
The poses are offerings of worship to Krishna and this is not a secret. A simple internet search will reveal the origins and purposes of this practice. Looking back on my experience, maybe that’s why I received those are you lost looks. Even the word “practice” hints to the greater significance of yoga. You may hear the word practice, and your mind may immediately reflect on hours of band, tennis, or piano lessons you endured or enjoyed as a child, but yoga practice is different.
It is the disciplined pursuit of union. Union of what you may ask. It is a union of mind, body, and soul with the universe. God is the creator of the universe. Genesis 1 verse 1 tells us, “In the beginning God created the heavens and the earth”. Genesis also reveals that God created everything in the heavens and earth. We are not striving to become one with creation. God created the earth for us to enjoy and subdue not become one with it.
Jesus already died on the cross and rose again with all power in His hands. He holds the key to eternal life. He offers the gift of salvation to anyone who is willing to believe and accept His finished work that was done on the cross. For those who accept the gift of Jesus will be saved and the Holy Spirit will be given unto them. In these last days we must examine things.
Look deeply into things before you participate. If it's popular with others, pause and think about John 15:19. Scripture that says the world loves its own, but it hated the Lord and it did not recognize Him. Therefore, we will be hated as well because the world first hated the Lord and because we don't belong to the world it will hate us too.
Yoga was the example I was urged to share but what in your life has God been trying to get your attention about? What are you participating in that is popular and loved by the world but isn't really in alignment with God? Stay in alignment with God and be led by the Holy Spirit in all you do. Shalom.
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